Last week a Greeley Colorado man was surprised to hear of his own death. Apparently, his obituary had run in the local paper, placed by a family member upset with Edgar Balderrma's .
Friends and family were calling Balderrma's wife. Well-wishers descended on the family. People even brought money to his not-widowed wife, to help raise their two children.
And since he was out working at the dairy, he missed out on dozens of frantic phone calls and text messages, wondering what had happened.
The guy was oblivious to the second-most important event in his life. He came home to a house-full of family and friends. Tears flowed and everyone was smiling.
He was taken aback by the whole thing, but then mildly happy at the reception his near-death brought. "Everyone missed me," he said.
In a few minutes I'll walk out to get today's paper. And I normally do read the obituaries. There is something honoring about the act, noting the final words of a life. But what if my name were there?
What would be said? Who would rush to my home, to comfort my family? Would my affairs be in order, my relationships peaceful, my secrets all told? Could I look God in the eye, face-to-face, and honestly tell him I was ready?
Like Edgar. I'm not dead yet. And Lord willing, I'll have today to get the story straight.
Lord willing.
ReplyDeleteThere is much to think about here, David. Thank you.
Submitting an obituary for someone does seem slightly more evil than taking out a bunch of magazine subscriptions in his name. The latter thing, I think, is illegal. Not sure about the false announcement of death.
ReplyDeleteThis is a little It's-a-Wonderful-Lifeish. I do think we should spend more time celebrating our loved ones while they're alive (unless we're angry enough w/ them to want them dead).
Actuall, David, I have given quite a bit of thought to what I would like in my obit. I went thru a spell when I thought a listing of my "achievements" would be nice. Then, I thought maybe a little of my philosophy might be good.
ReplyDeleteFinally, I have arrived at the point that the only thing important is this: "He was a Christian".
"I have to go home because I guess I'm dead."
ReplyDeleteI couldn't help but laugh at that. There's a whole range of emotion in this piece. And yes, I've often wondered about the legacy I'm leaving, about who would care when I am gone, about what would be said about me.
But what will be said about Him because of me? Who will care about Him because of me?
Some of us talked about online funerals at Laity Lodge--if and how we'd know and how we could grieve as a community. This made me think of that, too.
I was just in CO last week.
ReplyDeleteThis is such a great story. Imagine coming home to a house full of loved ones. Makes me think.
Sandra's comment made me think...what would happen if someone in my online community died. Would we know? Interesting.
Anyway, this story has had me thinking all day. I wonder which relative pulled the stunt. I read that he's getting charged with something.
ReplyDeleteI am thinking about Twain, "reports of my death have been exaggerated," and also Jesus, who said, "No man knows the hour."
we should all be so fortunate as to have our obit printed in the paper before our death
Interesting, David. If I had found out about it early enough, I might have stayed at the dairy a bit longer to see what transpired (just not so long that people eventually forgot about me and moved on).
ReplyDeleteyou are very much alive, and at least here in NY, you bring laughter, so much laughter :)
ReplyDeleteso many interesting questions raised here ...
ReplyDeleteOh boy, I feel creepy and inspired at the same time. (I think that's a compliment.)
ReplyDelete...99.9% of the 'good works' and accomplishments of the deceased written in obituaries will be tried and burned-up as by fire...Obituaries these days are moreoften used as a final desperate plea to God of the goodness and worthiness of the departed for admission into Heaven..i regularly work with 'bereaved' families in my profession and i've seen and heard it all...rotten to the core i tell ya..
ReplyDeleteThis does get one thinking. And funny how, when we don't get the story straight, it still gets pulled into another story and then straightens out, at least on one side of eternity.
ReplyDelete"'Everyone missed me,' he said."
ReplyDeleteThere is a powerful message in this short statement.
I don't want anyone to be devasated when I'm gone, but I do hope to leave a big hole in their lives.
Thanks for sharing!
Wow. Gives food for thought. Praying to complete the race well.
ReplyDeleteInteresting story! I have often wondered what my legacy will be after I'm gone. "Everyone missed me" would be good, but I'm hoping for something like, "I could see God in her." Definitely something to think about!
ReplyDeleteI think that would be a gift in a way, to know how people felt about you and who wanted to help the ones left behind in your absence. But this definitely makes one think doesn't it?
ReplyDeleteI think that would be a gift in a way, to know how people felt about you and who wanted to help the ones left behind in your absence. But this definitely makes one think doesn't it?
ReplyDeleteI think that would be a gift in a way, to know how people felt about you and who wanted to help the ones left behind in your absence. But this definitely makes one think doesn't it?
ReplyDeleteWhat an odd little story, so well told. Thank you, David. A mean trick that sort of backfired in ways its perpetrator didn't envision - people grief-stricken and sad at the report. Well, I for one am very glad you are still around. And I'm certain if such an error should ever be made about you, the circles of care would be huge.
ReplyDeleteIt reminds me a little bit of Harry Bailey, and at the end of the movie, he came home to a whole house full of people. He knew he was loved. And it changed the way he lived.
ReplyDeleteI wonder how things might change for this guy, too.
Great post, David. Really glad you linked up.
"I'm not dead yet"! No, sir!
ReplyDeleteThis reminds me of the time I was late coming home, and my husband and sons were so worried. Nearing panic, even. It felt good! :)